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Tuesday, November 30, 2004
I think we’re making actual progress here.

For the past several months, when we’d ask Mia, “What’s your name?” or “Mia, what’s your name?” she would reply, “Mommy!” In the past few days, though, her answer’s been “Mee-na!”

It’s a tough world of identifiers that we’re bringing our daughter up in. Two grandmothers (well, my mother and my dad’s wife . . . who are different people) who want to be called “Nana” (with different pronunciations, of course). Two grandfathers who are “Papa” and/or “Poppa” (again with the varied pronunciations). Michelle’s mother wants to be “Grandma,” but I keep pushing “Ma-maw” (which her children had called her mother . . . and which she hates); Mia calls her “Momma” and Michelle “Mommy.”

I’m just “Daddy.” Except when Mia wants something. Then we’re all “Mommy.”

Saturday, November 27, 2004
I'm Rooting for You, Fuckers.
Michelle's still in Jacksonville at the infinitely disorganized mutual-masturbation-a-thon music festival. Tonight, Mr. ADD (also significant-other-less) will be coming over to watch the USC / Notre Dame game. Collectively, I don't think we could care less about either team. He'll likely be rooting for USC because he wants as many teams as possible to finish undefeated so that there will be a BCS controversy. And I'll be rooting for Notre Dame (Satan help me) because I hate the PAC 10 and teams that are #1 from wire to wire.

In other news, Thanksgiving went well. Except for walking into that porch light and ripping an inch-long gash in my scalp. Oh, and dropping that 4 x 12 on my big toe.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004
It’s a Bouillabaisse. It’s a Pot Luck. It’s a Jumbled Mess.
I’m Too Lazy Uninspired to Write a REAL Heart-Wrenching Post Like the Rest of You.*
Y’know how when you’re taking group photos and there’s always that one person who fucks up the picture by looking like a total douche? Well, that’s me. I never know how to smile, always getting caught up in the show-teeth-or-not internal debate. And then there’s my lazy eye. Sweet Christ.

Besides being an overly long experience, the Sears Photo-Trough Adventure™ went fairly well. We got some nice pictures. Maybe some of you will see them.


The super-exclusive political ‘blog planning meeting went well. We’ve decided on a name (can’t tell you yet) and some broad conceptual . . . stuff. More details as they become available presentable fully prepared for world domination.


Our computer is in an Arafat-esque coma. Thankfully, it’s never been an Islamic terrorist, because the Indian Guy I Know is going to fix it. Which he likely wouldn’t do if it were an Arab-backed system.


My band has been in the process of reinventing / reconstituting itself for the past few months after the loss of a founding member. But we’ve finally gotten our shit together enough to play a show, and we’re making our debut next month. The new name of the band? Tomorrow, We Will Be Victorious. (I shit you not.)

It may be a temporary name. It was a half-joke I offered as we were voting for band names the night before the election; if John Kerry won, that was going to be our name. Although that didn’t happen (sadly), the Bush-scenario name (Pornova) is a licensed porn site and we haven’t come up with anything else we can all agree on (and/or live with). At least we can agree not to hate this name.


Fuck the South. That’s a real eye-opener. It’d be funnier if I didn’t live in this “shithole.”


I’ve unexpectedly received a couple CDs over the past few days weeks. The first was from Rob, sent just before he left to the other side of the goddamn planet . . . and it rocks! The other was received more recently; Debbie, I’ll finally get a chance to listen to it tonight while I’m doing stuff around the house. Thank you, Rob and Debbie!

On the CD-making front, I’ll be doing another mix soon. Once my computer is raised from its fucking grave! (Speaking of which, I sent a packet of long-overdue, oft-re-routed CDs to that fine couple in Tulsa. Did those ever make it? Is the U.S. Post Office gonna fuck me again?)


I added a few new sites to the ‘blogroll last week in anticipation of some grand, related post (which never happened). I feel like there are more to add, but I can’t remember who they were. Maybe they can comment to remind me . . ?


So I played poker on Sunday. It was a seven-person game of Texas Hold ‘Em, with a $10 buy-in. I was the third person eliminated. We’ll be playing poker again on Thanksgiving. My brother-in-law has won about $100 in the past week or so. It’s gonna be hard not to donate more of my money, but I have a feeling I will.

I’m off (mostly) tomorrow. And because of the aforementioned computer problem, I might not be updating very frequently. But I’ll be spending time at the in-law’s (cat- and house-sitting), and their computer is 100% un-fucked. Maybe I’ll see you sooner than you think.

* So I’ll just continue ripping off the best ‘blogger I’ve never met in Real Life. (That’s not meant to be a back-handed compliment, either.)

Friday, November 19, 2004
You Ain't Seen Nothin' Floppy Yet!
In mere moments, I'm leaving work (early) to pick up Mia, meet Michelle, and go to Sears for some Christmas-picture-taking action. Our presence in said pictures has been requested and, thus, I'm more dressed up than I'd like to be on a Friday (i.e., I'm wearing a white button-down shirt [tucked in] and nice[er] shoes).

After that, we'll be picking up the house a little before Michelle goes to the studio (for Day 2) and I stay home to host my Political Blog Brainstorming Pow-Wow. (This will necessitate a run to the grocery store for wine and cheese, I should think. If we were meeting to discuss a Right-Wing 'blog, it'd be Miller High Life and pork rinds.)

The weekend plans are a little up in the air. There may be poker. There may be intensive yard work. There WILL be football-watching though, as my alma mater takes on their most pitiful hated rival, the Gators.

I know, I know. And "excitement" is my middle name.

Thursday, November 18, 2004
Something to Thai’d You Over
Michelle and I had Thai for lunch today. She stuck to her new safe pick (Panang Curry) while I tried something a little different (Chicken with Black Bean Sauce). Mine came with tiny mushrooms, which I picked out and put on Michelle’s salad plate for her to eat. She ate a few with her meal. When she was “done,” there were several left.

“You’re done? You didn’t finish your fungi.”

“My fungi space is full.”

“But they look so sad.”

“They’re lonely. They miss their vegetable friends.”

“But they have each other. Maybe they’d be happier in the bowl of curry sauce. I know I’d be happy in a big bowl of curry.”

“Who wouldn’t?”

Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Want Your Vote(s) Back?
Hey, Moderate Republicans and Reagan Democrats . . . feeling that regret right about now? Wha--? Y’say you didn’t realize that Colin Powell was going to leave right after the election?

Yes, they’re still counting (or re-counting) the votes in some states, but the Administration is already shedding a lot of Cabinet members, including the once-respectable Powell.

I really thought Powell would wait until closer to the Inauguration to jump ship. But we knew he was leaving, even as the Administration Bush-Cheney ’04 campaign chose to downplay it because they were worried about the votes they’d lose if people realized one of the few voices of reason was leaving.

But, Sweet Baby Jesus, it’s nice to see John Ashcroft going. Of course, they’ll just dip into the Vat of Evil to replace him. Maybe the next guy will bring some Scotch Tape for the Constitution. Probably not, though.

Monday, November 15, 2004

Best Way to Turn $20 into $5.35? (Hint: It Involves Poker.)
Haven’t had much of a chance to play poker in the past several months. Seeing as we’re not gonna stop playing in our bands, and we can’t stop being parents, looks like that gambling addiction will stay in the trunk.

However, we’re trying to put together a semi-regular family game. Yesterday, it was our niece’s belated birthday party, for which a group of us related-types helped break in my not-so-new-but-wholly-unused poker chips. I think the pot was over $60. Michelle and I contributed (in every sense of the word) $10 each. Michelle chased two hands (back to back!) and lost most of her money (giving me the rest). I didn’t see any great cards, and only won a single large pot (on pure luck). We were running short on time, so we set an ending point (that luckily came with me still holding chips).

I think the whole thing lasted just an hour and a half.

I don’t think we can afford to have family games that follow a similar pattern. My brother-in-law, on the other hand, can afford it very nicely.

Friday, November 12, 2004
Blog Intertia
A 'blogger at rest tends to remain at rest, right? (Unless acted on by an outside Meetup, it would seem.)

I had every intention of posting more Meetup-related fallout on Tuesday, but all the slacking I'd been doing in recent weeks caught up with me. See, we'd gone through many months of relatively increased activity at work . . . and then it stopped. So, I was happily catching up on my slack time. When the work started coming in again . . . well, I was quite content to continue half-assing it. And then I took a day off for the Meetup. And then one of my projects was greatly underestimated (see the kind of passive voice I have to deal with here?). And THEN I had to take a half-day for Veterans' Day (daycare closed).

I know, CW . . . 'blogging about being busy at work is LAME.

Point is I'm gonna need to be born-again next week. (Or, born-again-again if you count the fact that the Meetup was quite the eye-opening experience.)

This weekend, there is quite a lot going on, so it should be drippingly heavy with material.

Monday, November 08, 2004
Stats That Shape a Meetup

Number of Bloggers Present: at least 9
Tab for Opening-Night Dinner (With Tip, For Nine People, with a Respectable Amount of Drinks): $227.29 (I know because it went on my credit card!)
Number of “Strip Clubs” Visited: 1
Number of Drinking Games Played: 3 (but only one with any amount of real commitment)
Amount of Alcohol Present at “Cookout”: a metric shit-ton . . . seriously, I couldn’t even begin to tell you how much there was to drink . . . okay, for starters, there were no less than eight varieties of vodka
Number of People Who Threw Up: 0 (that I know of)
Number of People Who Passed Out: depends on how you define “passed out,” but I’d say at least one
Number of Drinks for Yours Truly Over the Meetup’s 30-Hour Duration: about 13

I could probably go on and on, but I’ll leave it at that. Personally, I wish I’d planned a little better (particularly for the poker and mix CDs), but it turned out great anyway. We met a lot great people this weekend, and I really hope that we can do it again sometime soon.

Thanks also to CW for letting us meet at his house . . . and, particularly, for letting us play “Asshole” in his living room.

More tomorrow. In the meantime, if you haven’t already, go here to see pictures. And here.

Friday, November 05, 2004
Mission: Meetup
I'm writing this from my sister-in-law's apartment in Atlanta (Alpharetta, actually). We're here for the 'blogger Meetup, which has it's opening ceremony* tonight. We've been here less than four hours and, already, we've been in a car accident.** And had some good Thai food at a mall downtown.

This Meetup will be the focus of several 'blog entries (I'm sure) next week. To help me get in the spirit (and update my 'blogroll), please leave a comment if I haven't added you over there and you've commented before; several of you have left comments and I keep forgetting to write those addresses down.

(Much, much, MUCH) more later.

* By "ceremony," I mean softening up the ol' liver.

** This really happened. Michelle was driving and sort-of side-swiped someone. Hello, $500 deductible! Hello, higher premiums! Michelle says it's karma for saying earlier that she was going to shoot some slow drivers in front of us, take them out of their cars, and run over their bodies.

Wednesday, November 03, 2004
I didn’t see THAT coming. Sweet fuck. I’m trying to find something positive to hang my body from hat on, but I’m not sure I can. While Styro was talking about going pyro (on herself), I was considering how “it will be interesting (I didn’t say ‘fun’) to see what the Republicans do now that they are truly (and unquestionably) in power.” I’m a little wary that it may involve sticking it to us somewhat, but if they can’t get something done (that benefits the country and DOESN’T involve torching the Constitution), then perhaps this nationwide lurch to the Right™ will be temporary. Because any missteps now . . . it’s on their watch.


Tuesday, November 02, 2004
Vote or Die
I do what Sean “P. Diddy” Combs tells me to do.

My voting experience started out normal enough until I was confronted by some Republican poll-watcher who asked me who “a floppy-haired fuck” like me would vote for, so I looked him in the eyes (to distract him) while I kicked straight into his kneecap and sent him down like a sack of potatoes. I don’t remember when the gunshots started, or the fire. I’d actually forgotten that I had my voter’s registration card, which would have cut my time (10 minutes) in half. Yes, I had my sample ballot all filled out as a guide. And forget the Bush-approved touch-screen crap with no paper trail. Opti-scan is the way to go.

There were more people outside with signs for Kerry and people with signs supporting/rejecting various state amendments than there were people voting. No line, no waiting. I noticed when I signed the registration book that at least a quarter of the people in my precinct had already voted (absentee).

For the record, I did vote for a token Republican*.

* She is running for state Senate, and she often breaks with her party. So much so that she’s been stripped of committee seats and chairs. And she sent a load of manure to a powerful Capitol lobbyist. Really, how can you vote against that?

Monday, November 01, 2004
Trying to Fix What Ails Me (and My Motherfucking Car)
Friday, I told the story of a sick toddler. Shortly after the story was posted to the intarweb, it became a story of a sick father (and the continuing saga of a sick mother). Chapter 2 started with that generalized “queasy” feeling as I was leaving work and turned to a full-blown “pre-nausea” as I was contemplating going to see The Start when Michelle came home from her opening slot. Saturday was a lovely ride of ricocheting between “severe acid reflux / Ashlee Simpson” and “mild nausea.” When the awfulness abated somewhat, I made myself get up and clean stuff. I actually swept and mopped approximately 80% of the house (all hardwood and tile) and rearranged part of our bedroom. And then got to take a nap and/or watch some late-afternoon football.*

To make myself feel more human, here’s a short list of the things I took:
-- Mylanta
-- Maalox Max
-- Tagamet HB
-- Ibuprofen**
-- Pepcid***

MEANwhile, my car is anything BUT normal. Apparently, there have been two updates to the A/C-related equipment, one of which (windshield grommets) helps keep the A/C water drain from getting clogged (replaced last time). This time, my A/C fan is shot, so they have to replace it (not in stock), and I have to go back in a week; the even-more-recently updated equipment comes with the fan. The HOPE is that all the new shit will keep standing water from collecting in my floorboards, and my car from smelling like New Jersey.

I felt a little bad for being a prick to the service-counter girl at the Mitsubishi dealership, but I was JUST THERE WITH THE SAME PROBLEM LESS THAN A MONTH AGO. And THEN she goes for the hard sell on a new brake job, a tune-up, and a 30,000-mile service (at $400!).

I can only imagine my posts for the remainder of the week will be election-related. But, being where I am (the epicenter of election scandal in 2000), you could get some first-hand accounts of the post-election legal fallout.

Let’s all pray to Baby Jesus that it doesn’t come to that.

* Damn Seminoles.

** For my set-your-clock-back headache that kept me up half the night.

*** This is the WMD for the lingering stomach acid; I never got around to using it.