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Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Wait, What is This . . . the 1970s? Because That Chevy Looks to Be a Mid-90s Model. And YOU SHOULD BE SHOT IN THE FACE, WHORE!
I make many of my daily observations by looking in the rearview mirror. Like, today, there was a woman in a beige Chevy pickup / SUV behind me at the light (on my way home to meet the heater-repair guy for our seemingly annual heater meltdown). She looked to be around my age, listening to an older woman who was talking to her from the passenger seat; we’ll pretend it was her mother . . . and she was nagging.

The younger woman had a cigarette between the fingers of her right hand, which was clutching the steering wheel. The cigarette was beckoning to be stubbed out. And between these two women, there was a child playing--head popping up over the dashboard periodically and between the two seats, just below a yellow air freshener hanging from her rearview mirror. The younger woman (mother?) didn’t seem to notice anything, her eyes fixated straight ahead (probably looking at the jerkoff in the car ahead of her who was glaring into his rearview mirror).

Look, I’m not sure how most of us survived the 1970s, being so ugly of a decade and the fact that our parents didn’t strap us down and smoked in the car and let their friends blow smoke in our faces on trips to Disney World. But haven’t we moved beyond that? Evolved? My feeling is that people who smoke are fine, but people who smoke with their kids in the car are just shitty human beings. And people who smoke with their kids in the car while their kids are just wandering around . . . well, that takes “shitty human being” to another level. Perhaps “shitty human being plus.” Or would that be “minus?”