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Friday, January 07, 2005
Losing the Battle, Losing the War
The other morning, I woke up and got ready for work. As is the routine, when I was dressed and clean-shaven, I went out to the living room to eat my cereal and watch Headline News. It was then that I noticed our cat had peed on the couch. Again. There was even a puddle of it resting in an indention. The offending cat was standing there, looking up at me, waiting for me to sit down and provide him with the customary warm lap.

All the cleaning up after him, all the piss-prevention we’ve done, all the extra litter-box cleanings . . . every way to fight the War on (Feline-Urine) Terror, and we just keep losing. So, I decided to try something new.

In the heat of the moment, I grabbed the cat by the scruff of his neck, flipped him onto his back, and proceeded to wipe up the cat pee with him. Strangely, startled and angry Siamese cats aren’t very absorbent.

Of course, while victory seemed within my grasp, he went to clean himself . . . sitting on my pillow. Still, he hasn't peed on anything outside of the litter box in four days.


I’ve read lots of New Year’s Eve stories that pale in comparison to mine: Going to the in-law’s and playing Scrabble ‘til midnight (and beyond). That’s it. That’s what we did (throw in a lot of beer and champagne to get the full effect).

Michelle and I hadn’t played in years, but we warmed up on Michelle’s mom and sister (respectively), setting up a “championship” game the next morning. Which she won. And a rematch that night that she won. And another rematch a couple nights ago that she won (but not so much as I lost . . . drawing the Q, Z, W, X, and a blank to start the game . . . I mean, WTF?).

Look, Michelle’s good. Stefan Fatsis would probably call her “livingroom good,” but still.

I feel so small.


To track my resolutions from last year, I kept a list of all the books read and movies seen; the goal was 12 and 52, respectively. I think I made it on the books, but only watched slightly over half of the movies. So, anyway, I’ll try again this year.

Other resolutions for 2005 are to not weigh more a year from now (that’s as emphatic as I can be about personal fitness at the moment) and take more pictures (AND post them) and write more poems (AND post them, too).

Oh, and be a better husband and father.

I guess that’s it.