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Tuesday, June 15, 2004
When Tropical Rain Happens to Good People a Good Person
Inevitably, when you (meaning me) have to make a lunchtime run to Eckerd Drugs to buy Father’s Day cards (and toilet paper), the increasingly dark sky that’s been threatening to piss down rain all morning will open up its Heavenly Bladder on you (again, me) as you’re about to make your walk from the too-far-away-but-hard-won parking spot to the store.

And, of course, on your way back to work, the traffic light at one of the most confusing and busy intersections in town will be flashing red and no-one will know what to do. C’mon, people, Tallahassee gets over 5 feet of rain a year and the traffic lights inevitably go out within the first few drops . . . this is nothing new. If this had been an actual emergency, you would have been instructed to get THE FUCK off the road because I know how to drive.

Ah, ‘tis the (Hurricane) Season. (And Jesus sure as Hell ain’t the reason. Neither is Hoobastank, for that matter.)