web tracker

Wednesday, March 17, 2004
Rules of the Road
We here at Kamikaze Lunchbreak have a deep, dark hatred for most other drivers on the road. And I’m pretty sure we weren’t born that way.

I used to mentally keep track of aggressive drivers and the types of cars in which they hurdle through traffic. This is how I came to loathe people who drive Ford Mustangs. In a brief and completely unscientific study, set up to prove that the Mustang drivers were indeed the most aggressive assholes on the road, I found that drivers of small pickup trucks were even more apt to cut you off and/or speed through rush-hour traffic. I mean, the Mustang drivers placed pretty high on the list, but they were a distant second to small-truck rednecks.

Now, the question is not whether Michelle and I are aggressive drivers (she is and I’m not most of the time), the question is: If I saw you in traffic, would I be muttering “Motherfucker” under my breath and shaking my head at you, or would I smile and wave?