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Friday, September 05, 2003
I Swear
I’m a bad person, just like the rest of you. My mouth is a dirty place where the demons dwell. And when I’m not spouting alliteration, or trying to sound halfway intelligent, you can bet I’m cursing. I’d wager that 75% of the words that come out of my mouth while I’m driving are swearing-related . . . with or without Mia in the car. And that includes song lyrics and baby talk.

So, in honor of Friday, here is my list of the Top 10 curses favored by Mr. Lunchbreak:

10. you fuck

9. eat my ass

8. sweet gentle God/Jesus/Lord

7. Mother of God

6. oh, come the fuck on

5. what the fuck?

4. God dammit

3. Jesus Lord

2. Jesus God Christ

1. Jesus Fucking Christ

I’m not sure why our Lord and Savior has such a prominent place in my naughty, filthy, salty language. Maybe if he had more of a place in life, I wouldn’t call out to Him so.